Friday, January 04, 2008

Lazer Quest(ions)

Q: Is there any funner thing that can be did on a Thursday night than to play lazer tag for brothers birthday?

A: Nope

Q: But isn't it kind of dorky?

A: Yup

Q: Surely there is a funner thing to do, isn't there?

A: Not unless there is a game called lazer french-out.

Q: "French out" that sounds gross. Do you have any suggestions for making innocuous forms of affection sound gross?

A: Good question. Yes, if you want to make some form of affection sound gross, make it a gerund (or past participle) then add a direction: (french kiss =frenching up ex: I totally got frenched up last night, hugging = front hugging ex: I am really into front hugging these days).

Q: Does Michelle Hoon have a grosser version

A: Yup, but I will let her tell it.

Q: Are you some sort of perv.

A: No, it just sounds like it, most of my friends think I am a prude, I blush when I walk by a women's underwear store.

Q: nerd

A: that's not really a question now is it?

Q: Ah hah, the questioner has become the question-ed. HOW D'YOU LIKE ME NOW!?!?

A: I like you just fine.

Q: Do you have any pictures that you have took that demonstrate your patriotism?

Q: I question your patriotism.

A: Well then I guess we know who your uncle is not (Sam).

Q: Happy New year?

A: whatevs.


Brian said...

this is your best post yet. Whatevs

Sarita said...


Damian said...


Smithereens said...

Dang it Damian, that post is REALLY funny. Thanks for making me laugh. Unfortunately I know something dorkier to do for a birthday than play laser tag...

wild murdocks said...

I like the term, "french-kissery". It makes it a little less perverse and more like a collection of moves in your intimacy reprertoire. Though I lean to prudary myself(naughty by nature, prude by choice).

Moonbird said...

Do others have conversations like this too?! Who are you?

Here's one of my recent favorites:

Babe= you know, babe. "He/she is such a babe." A good-looking good person of goodness.

Rainbow= A hippie personage, one who might attend the Rainbow Gathering, colorful, peaceful, all-loving

"He/she is seriously babing it rainbow."

Use it, you won't regret it.

T.R. said...

Wow it's lunchtime. I off to ham up the front of my head.

Grant said...

Freedom! So many terrorist fell dead to earth when you posted that on the world wide interweb. Freedom is supposed to hurt.

UZI said...

ok seriously, you are freak'n hilarious! Good thing we know the same people who have the same humor. If you think about it, that somewhat makes us hilariously related.

Damian said...

Thanks Uzi, at one point you were my favorite type of machine gun.

Who do we mutually know?