Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Mathematics Et Cetera: Pechrifyd

I got to be in this little music video as a sad clown. It was done in some spare time a week or so ago.

Friday, October 20, 2006

Hate Crimes

I wonder if my feelings for the E! channel will make me a criminal.

Saturday, October 14, 2006

PEN PALS!!!

So I guess I have a new pen pal. I got this letter from Mrs. Elizabeth Coleman. She seems like a sensible sort:
GOOD DAY,

It may come suprice of receiving this my letter but
dont be suprice i need a help from you,
I am Mrs.Elizabeth Coleman from Ivory Coast. I am a
widow being that I lost my husband a couple of months
ago. My husband was a serving director of the Cocoa
exporting board until his death.

He was assassinated last january by the rebels
following the political uprising. Before his death he
had an account here in Cote d, Ivoire up to the
tune of $7.5m (SEVEN MILLION FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND
UNITED STATE DOLLAR) which he told the bank was for
the importation of cocoa processing machine.

I want you to do me a favour to receive this funds to
a safe account in your country or any safer place as
the beneficiary. I have plans to do investment in your
country, like real estate and industrial production.
This is my reason for writing to you. Please if you
are willing to assist me and my only son Franck,
indicate your interest in replying soonest.

N/B note that all the necessary document use in
deposit are with me and also asurering you that there
is100%risk free in this transaction.
PLEASE KINDLY REPLY ME WITH THIS MY DIRECT
EMAIL(eliz_coleman2002@yahoo.fr)

Thanks and best regards
Mrs.Elizabeth Coleman






Okay Mrs. Coleman, I am in. This is how I replied:



Dear Mrs. Coleman,

I was very suprice to get your letter. I now that sometimes these letter is not true, so please send me a picture of you and your son so I know that this letter is true. Please in your picture, be eating waffles, so I know that you take the picture for me and not from the internet.

These times are difficult in Affrica, what is it like there? do you have servants?

I talked to my bank and they said my bank account is biggest enough to hold your money. Please send pictures and money soon!

also, do I get a chocolate for helping in this adventure.

Sincerlely,

Mister Jamison Concorde




I hope she don't mind that I used someone elses real name instead of my own.

Friday, October 06, 2006

Tragedy: The Internet

Statistics don't lie. Sure they embelish, but they don't lie. Do you know what statistics are saying RIGHT NOW! If you you listen closely you can hear their tiny tinny voices telling us that the two most common uses of the internet are for 1. pornography and 2. geneology. This is a tragedy.

To some, this tragedy is obvious, but to me it is such a sad image. You see if you are doing one of the most common things on the internet you are bound to run into the other. I imagine a kind old pornographer stumbling on an errant geneology email and now he fritters away the waning hours of his perverted little life trying to create family trees.

so tragic.

Monday, October 02, 2006

New Television Programming

Here is a pretty good idea for a TV show:

You take a wayward celebrity, like maybe Paris Hilton, and with the help of some of his friends (accomplices) you "set them up" like they are going on a hike or something up the mountain. When they go up hiking though, they stop to take a break and people start pulling out notepads and radios and then they all start listening to LDS General conference.

Later, at her baptism, Ryan Gosling or maybe Ricky Schroder* comes in wearing a wayward baseball cap, and they are all: "You just got Church'd!" And then Paris gets all upset and then flips off the camera (but with the fake birdie finger, 'cause in the third discussion she learned that the real birdie is a sin).

I think this could be a big hit. I also have to give someone else partial credit for the idea. If this show "hits" I will give them a "from an idea by" credit.







*we can work out the specific casting details later, but whoever it is, they will have to wear a wayward baseball cap.