Friday, January 19, 2007

Race for the Cure

Does anyone know of a cure (or treatment) for social lethargy? I am pretty sure simply watching Battlestar Gallactica isn't the cure, but I don't think I can know that for a fact without trying.

Also, does anyone know of a site where I can download a good backrub?

I would really appreciate it if my fans would help me out with this.

Thursday, January 18, 2007


I want to start and MLM and sell health supplements.

My first product will be called NutraBurger.

Saturday, January 13, 2007

Handsome New Year

My new years resolution was going to be "Be with more handsome people", but that is kind of impossible.

If anyone is looking for someone to stand around looking handsome, I am available for parties and whatnot. To answer the questions that you are forming, yes, that IS velvet, and NO you won't be disappointed.

Monday, January 08, 2007

Happy New Year

So far here are my new years resolutions:

1. Sit down one night and write some New Years resolutions. Choose a night when you can be alone, just you and your quest for resolutions, and maybe a nice cup of hot cocoa (use that new recipe that you just invented that uses chocolate pudding and melted symphony bars). Get your room all cleaned up for this (laundry IN the baskets), because you can't set goals in a mess. Choose the goals that will really make your life better, stretch you and get you going. Make them meaningful yet not overly sombre. Really spend some time with this, I mean this is your year, but at the same time don't get to serious. Make them attainable yet ambitious (you don't need another year of "become an astronaut" to haunt you the year through, and you know "eat a tuna fish sandwich once a month" only leaves but the hollowest of victories). Use some nice paper for this and keep it in a special place so that you won't lose it, but also keep it in a place so you can review it often. Share the goal with someone important so they will make you accountable, but no one that is going to be a jerk about it when you don't do enough push-ups or haven't really been that good at keeping your room clean (to their standards). Maybe have a theme, like you do for summers. Have a couple of noble-sounding goals that you can tell other people about so they will thing you are noble and a couple of flippant ones that will make you seem delightfully insouciant. Set goals to use words that will impress/intimidate others. Make this year about other people, and how you can get other people to do stuff for you. Write these down with an elegant pen (maybe first draft in pencil). Use one of those micron pigment pens that don't fade so that you can always remember them or maybe just a Bic roundstick so you can write them fast. Either way remember the good paper, or better yet, put them in the front of a book. Nothing says "permanent" like a blank book (except diamonds, but c'mon, I don't have a lazer pen). Don't put it at the front, because when you are in church and doodling a picture of the bishop shooting lazers and that cute girl wants to look at your other sketches flips through and sees one of your goals is "Catch up on Battlestar Gallactica, figure out how to get number 6's phone number", so maybe write that in code, or Klingon. When you are done with the writing, sign and date it.

2. take a nap (from all the resolution making)